What are the problems that guys find really hard but girls may not understand? In a world with fixed ideas about people, these stories show the difficult things guys go through every day.
Let’s see things from a different perspective, where masculinity isn’t just about toughness but a mix of many feelings and experiences, prompting you to question if it’s fair for men to face these challenges and if they should be seen as normal.
1. Being With Children by Yourself
This man once went out to the playground with his 3-year-old niece. Half an hour later, the cops showed up, and he needed his sister to clear things up.
Men sometimes encounter situations where they are not allowed to be alone with a child, even when it’s their family member or own child. Thanks to societal biases and concerns about child safety.
2. Being the Victim of Domestic Violence
It’s a more common situation than you think, where men are victims of domestic violence, and the authorities don’t take them seriously. One explained he was laughed out of the police station when he attempted to report it.
This other man shared that his friend got third-degree burns because his girlfriend threw boiling water at him. When he went to the police station, they said he must have done something wrong to make her that mad.
3. Finding the Right Balance
Striving to strike a harmonious balance between emotional vulnerability and maintaining a sense of masculinity can influence various aspects of a relationship. This ranges from communication and intimacy to outward behavior.
This man shares that he is supposed to be emotionally vulnerable but still be masculine in such a way that he would still be attractive to women. He finds it impossible.
4. The Burden of Bravery
Feeling the pressure to step up in daunting situations, even when overwhelmed by fear and reluctance, is often expected of men due to traditional gender roles and norms.
Nolan says he sometimes doesn’t want to himself because men can also be scared. But it’s just expected of men to step up in scary situations.
5. Stereotyping Men’s Emotions
In a specific incident, this man once overheard his fiancé’s mother express a narrow view of men’s emotions. She seemed to believe that men have only two emotions: anger and desire.
This perspective appeared to suggest that anyone who displayed more complex emotions was insincere and merely pretending to pursue romantic relationships. This can be seen as an example of some people’s limited understanding of men’s emotional experiences and the stereotype that men are primarily driven by anger and desire in their interactions.
6. Parenthood and Unconditional Hugs
This husband and wife are incredibly affectionate with their young son, showering him with hugs and kisses. They acknowledge that there might come a time when their son no longer seeks such affection from his mother but is still comfortable with it from his father. They’ve heard stories of boys outgrowing the cuddling phase but hope to maintain a close bond.
Dani, who has adult sons, shares her experience, noting that her boys, now in their 30s, have never outgrown affection. They continue to hug both her and their father equally. They often hug their dad tighter because he doesn’t mind, whereas they might break her.
7. The Enigma of ‘Man Flu’
What baffles this man is the idea that women can’t fully understand the concept of being seriously ill and having it dismissed as “man flu.”
When a man feels unwell, it’s not uncommon for their condition to be playfully labeled as “man flu.” This term is often used jokingly to describe instances where men exaggerate or dramatize their symptoms, particularly when dealing with a mild cold or illness.
8. The Connection Between Earnings and Identity
There is this man who is amazed by the idea that women might not fully grasp the notion of having their sense of self-worth tied to their earning capacity.
This connection between self-esteem and financial success can be attributed to expectations and traditional gender roles, where men are often pressured to be the primary providers for their families. This dynamic can lead to a profound sense of responsibility and self-worth linked to their earning ability.
Middle-aged loneliness is a significant issue, especially among married men with kids. It often feels like making friends gets harder with age. If you’re not a stereotypical “bro,” close friendships can be scarce. You might be on good terms with colleagues at work or have occasional neighborly game nights, but these relationships tend to stay shallow.
In college, forming friendships is easy, but as an adult, real friendships can be hard, even with shared interests and time spent together. Also, you spend most of your waking hours with your coworkers, so finding someone you connect with is natural.
10. Breaking the Silence
Alex discusses the challenge of addressing mental health, highlighting personal growth. He observes that many men in his circle still struggle to discuss mental health openly. Alex is deeply affected by knowing people who have tragically taken their own lives due to mental health challenges.
The conversation around mental health can be challenging, regardless of gender. Yet, Alex highlights that expectations often dictate that men should “suck it up” or adhere to the notion that “men don’t cry,” leading to emotional suppression.
11. Romantic Interests
Figuring out romantic interest can be confusing; generally, it’s up to men to figure it out.
Men often express their affection and feelings readily, while women tend to be more selective and cautious in their responses, as they might receive an abundance of attention. Not all the attention wanted.
12. Breaking the Stereotypes
There was this man who explained it’s not appropriate to reinforce stereotypes by telling a woman to “get in the kitchen and make me a sandwich.”
However, it’s often deemed acceptable, and sometimes even encouraged, for a woman to criticize a man for being unable to perform a physically demanding task, saying, “You’re a man. You’re supposed to be able to do this!”
13. Short Men Facing Height Bias
A hidden struggle that women might not fully understand is the challenge faced by shorter men, who are often dismissed or criticized solely because of their height.
The bias against shorter individuals can lead to judgment and missed opportunities, especially in their dating life.
14. Gender Differences in Workplace Conversations
The workplace, where this man finds himself split between office work and public-facing duties, is a fascinating space for conversations among his female colleagues. It’s remarkable how they discuss various topics and get away with it, often to a degree that astonishes him.
Suppose he were to utter even half of the statements they make. In that case, he is certain he would face serious consequences, and justifiably so, as such remarks are generally considered inappropriate in the professional setting. This difference in what’s deemed acceptable conversation between genders in the workplace is quite glaring and continues to puzzle him.
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