Love affairs grab attention, whether seen on TV or experienced firsthand. But being in the middle of it is a different story. Ever thought about being in their shoes? Here, we reveal 13 harsh truths for children born from affairs.
1. Having Brothers and Sisters You Will Never Know
Growing up with brothers and sisters at home seems fun. But when you’re a child born from an affair, chances are there are brothers and sisters you will never know about and who will never know about you.
The upsetting part about this is that the world is cruel enough to live in. You could’ve had more people to support you if you knew them.
2. Legal Family Feels Threatened
When there’s an affair, there’s always the legal family that gets the brunt of the betrayal. And when a child is born from that, these legal families can’t help but feel threatened by a new family forming outside their control.
It’s a natural reaction to feel financially and emotionally threatened. Hopefully, though, a hand will reach out that can create a form of peace in the families.
3. Growing Up in a Loving Home Is All That Matters
Some children born from affairs are lucky enough to grow up in a loving home. Does it mean the two people who cheated on their partners get the happily ever after? Not necessarily.
It simply means having a family who loves you, whether it’s your mom or dad who stayed or even if your grandparents were the ones who raised you. What matters is that you grew up filled with the love and support of those you trust.
4. Left Homeless and Penniless
Some children born from affairs are unlucky enough to be left in the middle of all the mess. Since they come from the scandal, both families will try to hush everything up and go on their lives like they normally do. What’s left is a kid without a home and without a family to support him.
It will be difficult to have no one to lean on. It might be a cruel world, but you can still create your own family and learn from your dark past.
5. Feels Dirty and Undeserving
Many born from affairs feel like they’re dirty and undeserving of the lives they were given. Ultimately, they feel like their whole existence is a mistake and that they should’ve never been in this world in the first place.
These children deserve all the love and support they need, especially from their parents who brought them into this world.
6. Feeling Out of Place
When born from parents who already have their own families, a feeling of belongingness will always be missing. It’s especially heartbreaking when you don’t have a place to call a permanent home.
Even when someone somehow steps up to raise you, you still get trapped in your inner identity questions. Who’s your real family? What are you even here?
7. Bore the Resentment of Those Who Got Cheated On
Affairs will never be a good thing, and while children will always be a blessing even when born from an affair, they will leave a bad taste in many people’s mouths. Worse, they sometimes carry the weight of the parents’ sins and bear the resentment from the people who got betrayed.
No, you don’t deserve it, and it’s unfair that you had to experience that. Sooner or later, they’ll realize that you’re just a kid who didn’t have a say in who your parents are.
8. Got A Messed-up and Depressed Parent Growing Up
Depending on the situation they grow up in, children born out of affairs often have a depressed parent raising them. It may be because the other partner left them. And what’s left is a depressed parent who needs to raise a kid. Having a depressed parent growing up may end up messing up the child too.
9. Grew up in a Family Filled With Regrets and Resentments
When an affair happens, regrets and resentments can spring from it. Even if both parties try to work on their relationships to correct their mistakes and create a family, you cannot undo the past.
In this case, the couple will just feel miserable, and having a child growing up in that environment is awful. It’s good to at least try, but hopefully, the child won’t suffer from being forced to be together.
10. Confused Why Dad Was Always Away From Home
Many children born from affairs don’t have their biological dads with them. It would be great if someone stepped up to the role of a father, but sometimes they just don’t have one. As a kid, they get confused as to why others have dads and they don’t.
They sometimes get confused and create scenarios as to why their dads are always away. They might imagine it’s because their dads are a military man or an overseas worker.
11. Not as Awful With Understanding and Mature Adults Around
For the lucky ones, being born from an affair may not be as awful compared to what many imagine it is. It is only possible if all the adults around them are mature and considerate enough.
If you have a loving family regardless of your parents’ past, good for you!
12. Met the Nice Other Family but Have Nothing in Common
Even if the legal families of your parents are nice enough, meeting them may not bear that much fruit if you have nothing in common. Having half-siblings would be great, but it doesn’t mean you’ll always be together. Meeting the other family at least takes out the curiosity in your head.
13. Getting Treated Differently in the Family
Children born from affairs are treated differently. Granted that they have been accepted by the family, there’s this awkward space that won’t ever be filled. In your family, not everyone will treat you differently, and it’s best if you try and learn how to cope with it.
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Source: Reddit
MSN Writer, Radical FIRE
Expertise: Entertainment, Travel, Interior Design, and Personal Improvement Niches
Education: Bachelor of Science in Tourism, Major in Development Tourism Management at Ateneo de Naga University
Experience: Marisa Bolivar is a content writer with 10 years of experience in creating blogs and articles across different industries on the web. She has explored many niches in her years working as a content specialist with her favorite zeroing on entertainment, from books to movies and TV shows. Marisa is also a bookworm, who has a fondness for personal improvement and philosophical authors like Paulo Coelho and Mitch Albom.