On an online forum, a young woman posted about her tension-filled predicament: her engagement to a man is being contested by her older sister. To keep her identity hidden, we’ll refer to her as Reverie. Because Reverie’s sister insists on making her rethink her marriage plans, she decided not to invite her to the wedding.
Context: How Long Has She Been With Her Fiancé?
Reverie, age 24, recently got engaged to her 30-year-old fiancé, whom she had known for six months. Acknowledging that it may not seem like enough time to get to know a potential spouse, she claimed that they were “madly in love and ready to commit to each other fully.” She made it clear that she knew they were a good match for each other.
The Unsupportive Sister
Her problem arose when she announced the engagement to her older sister, who ended up being unsupportive of it.
Why Won’t Her Sister Support Her Engagement?
Reverie’s older sister had no qualms about the relationship before they planned to get married. In fact, when Reverie informed her about the engagement through a text message, she replied by congratulating her.
However, when they spoke a week later, her sister urged her to reconsider the marriage, telling her that she was still at an age where she could “meet people she could love more.”
Is Love Enough for a Lifelong Commitment?
Reverie was offended by her sister’s reaction. In her point of view, she was basically being invalidated. After all, she stated in her post that she “loves her fiancé more than anything.”
The sister also suggested spending more time nurturing the relationship before entering a permanent commitment with him. To this, Reverie argued that she and her fiancé were already fully bonded, so they “might as well get married and be recognized as soulmates in the eyes of the law.”
How Her Sister Got Uninvited, The Ultimatum
Deeply upset by their exchange, Reverie gave her sister an ultimatum: if she was not willing to support the marriage, then she had no right to attend the wedding. They have not been in contact since that serious conversation. Her sister subsequently ignored Reverie’s attempts to reach out through texts.
While working on the guest list for the wedding, Reverie and her fiancé both agreed that her sister wouldn’t be invited.
Is She Wrong for Choosing Not To Invite Her Sister to the Wedding?
Users who came across Reverie’s post on the platform responded with well-intentioned advice.
Many cautioned against rushing such a life-altering choice with someone she has known for less than a year and argued that she was not mature enough to make this legally binding decision. They explained that a relationship lasting only six months is not yet fully developed; therefore, jumping into marriage right away was not wise.
Do You Really Love Him?
One person wrote, “You have not known him long enough to actually love him. You are infatuated. On top of that, are you truly ready to ruin your relationship with your sister for a guy you actually do not know?”
The Significant Age Gap
Others pointed out that the age gap between the engaged couple was suspicious since a lot of personal growth occurs in your twenties, according to them.
Several users noted that it would be best for Reverie to contemplate the marriage plans more sensibly and possibly give it more time before carrying on with the wedding.
Did Her Fiancé Try To Manipulate Her?
Also, some commenters were concerned about the fiancé’s stance on the issue, as he seemed to be subtly attempting to keep Reverie away from her sister even though she was understandably doubtful about how the marriage would turn out.
To them, Reverie gave the impression that her affection towards him blinded her, and was naive to his manipulative tactics. They warned her that he could be convincing her to agree to the marriage immediately so as to “trap” her in it.
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